Dear momma's boy,
I know you've had your butt licked by your mother
I know you've enjoyed all that attention from her
And every woman graced with your presence after
Dear narcissus boy,
I know you've never really apologized for anything
I know you've never really taken responsibility
I know you've never really listened to a woman
Dear me-show boy,
I know you're not really into conflict resolution
Or seeing both sides of every equation
Or having an uninterrupted conversation
And any talk of healthiness
And any talk of connectedness
And any talk of resolving this
Leaves you running for the door
(why why do I try to love you, try to love you when you really don't want me to)
Dear egotist boy,
You've never really had to suffer any consequence
You've never stayed with anyone longer than ten minutes
You'd never understand anyone showing resistance
Dear popular boy,
I know you're used to getting everything so easily
A stranger to the concept of reciprocity
People honor boys like you in this society
And any talk of selflessness
And any talk of working at this
And any talk of being of service
Leaves you running for the door
(why why do I try to help you, try to help you when you really don't want me to)
You go back to the women who will dance the dance
You go back to your friends who will lick your ass
You go back to ignoring all the rest of us
You go back to the center of your universe
Dear self centered boy,
I don't know why I still feel affected by you
I've never lasted very long with someone like you
I never did although I have to admit I wanted to
Dear magnetic boy,
You've never been with anyone who doesn't take your shit
You've never been with anyone who's dared to call you on it
I wonder how you'd be if someone were to call you on it
And any talk of willingness
And any talk of both feet in
And any talk of commitment
Leaves you running for the door
(why why do I try to change you try to, try to change you when you really don't want me to)
You go back to the women who will dance the dance
You go back to your friends who will lick your ass
You go back to being so oblivious
You go back to the center of the universe
- alanis morissette
Talking to Americans Part II
So the other day I had a rather amusing run-in with a family of our friendly american neighbours. While the gentleman was searching his pockets for some canadian funds, he proceeded to ask "So is the canadian dollar equivalent to the british pound??" GOD IF THAT WERE TRUE ID BE A MILLIONARE! what a fantastic exchange rate that would be!!!! I was a bit speechless at the time, as I was still waiting for him to break out in laughter and say an extremely awkward but anticipated "JUST KIDDING!" when to my suprise...he wasn't joking at all. After i spent a good five minutes explaing how our dollar face value was exactly the same as theirs minus a mere 8 percent, we got into the subject of exchange rates. "So what does that mean exactly.." he proceeded. "So what is your dollar worth in american, like 20 cents? HA. Do you not know how to calculate simple math? (well i dont either, but I can still tell you that an 80 cent difference is far from correct) Don't you wish it was. Where do you people come up with this material? It is absolutely the funniest shit I have ever heard. And you say it with such a straight face! you have me so fooled. You have seriously GOT to be kidding...right???....
After that lovely exchange of words, Mr.Intelligence's daughter approaches me and I am once again speechless. ( twice in one day is pretty tough, well done.) I take a double look at the "Bling" hanging around her neck, and what I see is absolutely appauling. She has a gargantuan charm covered in jewels and crystals in the form of a very detailed HAND GUN! Call me old fashioned, but I really find that repulsive and extremely un-appropriate. If my daughter were to ever wear something so tasteless and un-fashion saavy I would rip that thing right off her neck, and send her straight to boot camp. (well, actually Ill just go ahead and admit right now that I would probably undo it properly, I mean who wants to ruin a perfectly good chain...minus the ghastly charm of course?)
So completely off topic, a lot has gone down lately, both for the good and bad. I will unveil these updates in the very new future...If i want.
After that lovely exchange of words, Mr.Intelligence's daughter approaches me and I am once again speechless. ( twice in one day is pretty tough, well done.) I take a double look at the "Bling" hanging around her neck, and what I see is absolutely appauling. She has a gargantuan charm covered in jewels and crystals in the form of a very detailed HAND GUN! Call me old fashioned, but I really find that repulsive and extremely un-appropriate. If my daughter were to ever wear something so tasteless and un-fashion saavy I would rip that thing right off her neck, and send her straight to boot camp. (well, actually Ill just go ahead and admit right now that I would probably undo it properly, I mean who wants to ruin a perfectly good chain...minus the ghastly charm of course?)
So completely off topic, a lot has gone down lately, both for the good and bad. I will unveil these updates in the very new future...If i want.
