my whole life

hello. here is an update.

So I am taking a leave of abesnce starting Oct.13th. yay 2 days before my birthday. I am then going to visit some pals in nelson for 5 days or so then its homeward bound to the rents house on vancouver island. I have decided to take a well deserved break for a bit, to focus on things that I have wanted to do and are important to me, but havent had the time to do. And plus it wont be to shabby to have the folks and bro around again for a bit, and I mean who can turn up some real home cooked meals. lol. I will miss my friend Adrienne (a gal here from Australia) a lot, but If I don't do this now I am afraid I never will. The building I am living in right now is actually going to be renovated in a couple of weeks, so I am changing residence for about a month before I head home. A bit of a pain to move so much, but the place I will be going to I will have my own room which is quite nice. I'm sleepy.


Something I've been wanting to say to you are you sitting down?Pretty soon, there will be a day,when I won't be around. I'm not trying to scare you or play with your sympathy. Just want to remind you that life is a symphony.

Everyday, live it like it's your last one. Every kiss, kiss it like it's your first love. If i had one wish; then I would wish that you would live today like everyday, Everyday is your last one. People always rushing around,wasting time on money. Don't be just a face in the crowd.Getting high and running from something. I'm not trying to tell you what to do. In the end, it's up to you.

Dip your feet into the ocean. Let the sun beat on your skin. Soak in every emotion,that you never thought you'd live. And never take for granted,every breath you're breathing in. Go everywhere you've never been.

Good news for people who love bad news.

This just in. Most of the things you do in your life dont prove to matter. at all. All my roomates have moved out and one friend remains. I have applied to a plethera of ridiculous places all over B.C. for a new job and havent had any responses. How nice. :) I don't have a boyfriend, or any more guy friends for that matter, and I am starting to think I never will. I mean why would I when there are perfectly good brain dead supermodels walking around just waiting to manipulate you? I mean, who needs an intelligent mind, creative, honest, and loving person to converse with when you can go for a girl who only eats grass and talks about herself all day long? god. what an excellent deal. Maybe it is fun to be someones sheep to be brainwashed until her hearts content. So what if she tells you that she wants you and every guy to want her, but not have her. To bad we dont all have that luxury to just pick and choose as we wish, "oh im finished with you, whos next on my list." Why do you guys insist on falling for it EVERY time? Are you driven to make yourselves look like idiots, is it some higher power, or are you all to stupid to even realize??? I'd give anything to have only one person to be interested in, or better yet, to be interested in me but that i guess is far to unrealisitc these days.

But what is the real world anyways.

Another thought. Why is everyone in such a rush to go to college or university right after high school? Why not wait 5 + years so you can have some time to actually decide want to do with your life. Or at least have something to look forward to. As for me, I am finished college now. Starting to feel like I didn't get a hell of a lot out of it. Depends on how you look at it I guess. And now what am I doing? Nothing. I become depressed by working my butt off in a place I don't really enjoy only to spend everything I have on things that can make me happy for about 5 minutes. Its just a continuous circle.

I miss my family. I love them so much and they are the only thing that matter to me anymore. They are the only people who will be there for you and love you for your entire life no matter what. Mom i wanna come home.

The ocean breathes salty, won't you carry it in? In your head, in your mouth, in your soul.
The more we move ahead the more we're stuck in rewind. Well I don't mind. I don't mind. How the hell could I mind?
Well that is that and this is this. You tell me what you want and I'll tell you what you get. You get away from me. You get away from me.
Well that is that and this is this. Will you tell me what you saw and I'll tell you what you missed, when the ocean met the sky. You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste the afterlife?

P.S. i miss you caity and april.