Fat. Naked. Dangerous

No I am not talking about me...i'm talking about cupid. He who brings along the romantic for some, dreadful for most, unimagineative, consumerist-oriented and entirely arbitrary, manipulative and shallow interpretation of romance day. Cupid just like any other man....or little person with wings, was selfish. He wanted the attention of a beautiful woman so much, it eventually to her demise (with the help of her jealous mother-in-law of course.) Classic love story right there.

Another good one, is the story of St.Valentine himself. Nothing says love like murdering a priest who performed secret marrige ceremonies for soldiers. (They had to be secret because marrige was seen as a "distraction" for soldiers at war and took their mind off fighting.....GOD FORBID THAT TO EVER HAPPEN.)
Now, I don't have anything against valentines day. It is a chance for people in relationships to redeem themselves for the lack of love they (don't) display every other day of the year. But let me tell ya, I have been single for coming up on 5 years now and I honestly see no point in this holiday what so ever. I don't even get paid stat holiday pay for having to put up with all the sappy shit that goes on throughout the day. Don't get me wrong though, I am not bitter. I think it is important for people to rekindle their love for eachother and really show how much your better half means to you. But I have honestly just never been a fan. I love my family and I tell them that every day of my life, I do not need some almost meaningless holiday to do so.

I say all of this like I could care less if prince charming (or even just a below average joe ) got me a dozen roses or chocolate covered strawberries; but I am sure if this rare occasion were to actually happen to me, I may just have to graciously accept. Nothing says I love you like dead vegitation and fat-saturated sugar products.

I guess we will never know.

Just remember, one day in February isn't special, but YOU are. HA. right :P

post script

is that what p.s. even stands for? i should really look into that.

it's obvious that I haven't written in my blog in decades. ok..maybe not since my birthday but whos counting, obviously i'm not because i'm no good at it.

I have been reading over some of the "dusty favorites" for inspiration and i really must say that I am extremely brilliant at making something out of nothing. It is amazing how absolutely nothing about my life is even remotely interesting, but I still manage to come up with some type of word vomit to take up a tiny portion of the giant intergalacitic space of web. K...that doesn't make sense but I had to try to make myself at least seem cool. I'm not fooling anyone though obviously, not even myself and usually thats pretty damn easy to do.

I have no idea where this post is going and it has taken me much longer to write then it should have as my chihuahua lulu demands to sit in between me and the laptop on my lap which doesn't make for a very comforatble situation but I love her to much to put her anywhere else. Shes got me sucked right into her little puppy scheme and its totally working.

i love everyone.

love lisa the average boring human being


is feeling crapulent as a result of the dissapearance of her all time favorite blog post. The crapulence could also be caused by lack of sleep and eating another piece of deli meat on the day of expiration date which is of course against her religion..of sorts.

See post titled "best before" for clarification (or even more ridiculous ramblings) on expiration date......s

See post titled "Crapulent" for a more detailed definition of this particular..............feeling?